Doom & groom

Illustration by Kim Rosen

First in line
In the reception line, my bride introduced me as her “first husband” to members of her family I’d never met. She liked this joke so much, she started introducing herself to my relatives before I had the chance. “Hi, I’m Kelly, and I’d like you to meet my first husband, Ben.” My family was not as amused as hers, though I thought it was pretty funny the first few times. A year later, when we approached the judge who was hearing our divorce case, I was really hoping she’d dust off the old line: “Hello, your honor, I’m Kelly, and this is my first ex-husband.” —Ben, Andersonville

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