Band camp

First off, bring a buddy. If you’re camping out in front of the AT&T stage from the time the gates open (11am) till Radiohead’s show (8pm), you’ll need someone to hold your spot when nature (or the beer tent) calls. Along with the basics (comfortable shoes, sunglasses), here’s an essential guide to help you through your nine-hour stakeout:

1 When Thom Yorke beckons the elements to “rain down” during “Paranoid Android,” show your solidarity by slipping on a Magellan’s Waterproof Poncho. It folds up to fit inside an attached pouch, so you don’t have to tie it around your waist like a dork. $34 at Magellan’s (800-962-4943).

2 If your buddy bails, strap on the Stadium Pal, essentially a concertgoer’s catheter, so you don’t lose your sweet spot while stuck in line for the loo. It’s as easy as putting on a condom, if you can, er, wrap your head around that. For comfort’s sake, we suggest forgoing those skin-tight jeans in favor of looser-fitting trousers. Perhaps a pair of Zubaz? Ladies, fear not—the Stadium Gal will slip right under that summer dress without a trace. $29.95–$35.95 (877-782-3675, biorelief.com).

3 Rock out without losing your hearing. Foam and wax earplugs only cut out the sharpest frequencies, leaving you with a bass-heavy mix that sounds like mud. Sensaphonics ER-20 earplugs are perfect for outdoor festivals, ensuring you’ll enjoy high-quality audio and your ears won’t be ringing the next day. $10 at Sensaphonics Hearing Conservation Inc. (660 N Milwaukee Ave, 877-848-1714).

4 Perhaps the most uninviting aspect of this all-day affair is how sore your feet are by the end. However, thanks to the gods of polyester, we have a solution: the Camp Chair! You can’t bring standard aluminum-framed chairs into the fest, but this model sidesteps those restrictions brilliantly. $19.99 at Uncle Dan’s (various Chicago locations, 888-246-4453).

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