Camping 101

Illustrations: Kathryn Brazier

Take a poo
1 Dig a hole: “I don’t care what anyone says, I know for a fact toilet paper does not dissolve over the winter unless you bury it. And if you don’t dig a hole, a fly can land on your number two and fly over to your campsite and land on your food. Use a stick to dig down about four inches to create what’s called a cathole.”
2 Take off your pants: “Actually, just one pant leg. Take it off and tuck the end into your other pant leg. This way, you can spread your legs a little and not worry about getting it all over yourself.”
3 Squat: “Some people wrap a belt around a tree to hold themselves up or lean on a horizontal log, but I don’t like that because then you’re always going on top of other people’s waste. Just bend your knees slightly and you’re off to the races.”
4 Cover your business: “Fill your hole back in and put a couple sticks in the shape of an X over it. This way your buddy doesn’t accidentally dig in the same spot later.”

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